For the sake of this post, the boys will be known by the following titles:
The 5-year old will be known as 'French Fry'
The 11-year old will be known as 'His Majesty'
The 13-year old will be known as 'M'
M likes to keep to himself for the most part. But over the summer, I like to think that we became buddies. We went to Hershey Park one day. M and His Majesty were arguing over who got to sit next to me on the roller coaster. I had them guess what number I was thinking of. M won. So I sat with him.
While waiting in line, I don't remember what we were talking about, but M and I had a disagreement. M raises his voice a little and asks "Do you want me to make a scene?" Before I can reply, he says, clapping his hands once "Aaand cut!" as if he is a director ending a scene. I have never been so proud of that boy! That joke my day!
His Majesty is always fun to be around. He's got such great energy and an awesome sense of humor. He's one of those kids that likes to hide and then jump out and scream when you least expect it. He's not very good at hiding, though. (Don't tell him I said that!)
His Majesty can be quite bossy, though, thus the nickname. He likes it when I say "Yes, Your Majesty." He smiles, but then catches himself and says "please". One day, I took the boys to this awesome playground. His Majesty asked me to throw away his Capri Sun pouch (without saying please). So I said "Of course, Your Majesty". His Majesty glared at me and said "Not in public, Philip!".
The jokes this boy tells! He loves 'Yo Momma' jokes. We were telling each such jokes one day. His Majesty starts out with "Yo Momma's so ugly, when One Direction saw her, they went the other direction." I fought back with "Yo momma's so fat, she uses a boomerang to put on her belt." French Fry then chimed in with "Yo Momma's so fat, she wears a yellow hat!" French Fry won.
Speaking of French Fry...I spend most of my day with French Fry. He randomly started calling me 'Nugget Head', so I call him French Fry. I'll often say his name to get his attention, then repeat it a couple more times. I'll then say "French Fry!". He looks up from whatever he is doing and says "My name's not French Fry!" But, I got his attention! Works every time!
French Fry loves playing on the computer at the library. He usually plays Reader Rabbit, but the other day, he played The Berenstein Bears. While listening to one of the stories, French Fry calls me over to tell me that Brother Bear had just said a bad word.
"He said 'shut up'! Freak you Brother Bear!"
I told French Fry to use kind words then quickly went off to a corner of the library to bust up laughing.
French Fry also loves swimming. One day, I took all three boys to the pool. At one point, French Fry informs me that he has to poop. So off he goes to the bathroom. Fifteen minutes later, he's still in the bathroom, so I go in to check on him. I know right away which stall he is in. I follow the sound of splashing. I get him to unlock the door for me. He opens the door, stark naked, water and and toilet paper all over the floor. He walks over to the toilet and pulls out his bathing suit.
"I didn't make it in time. I need to wash my bathing suit."
Ok, Philip, stay calm, I think to myself. I obviously can't let French Fry back in the pool. So I fetch his clothes and begin dressing him. We get his undies on (backwards) when he slips out of my grasp and runs out of the locker room. He runs around the pool in nothing but his backwards underwear. I catch him on his way to the parking lot.
Needless to say, we had a long talk on the way home.
As you all know, I love my job. I love these boys. They bring so much joy into my life. We have our struggles, but we're always able to work through them. At the end of the day, M, His Majesty, French Fry and I are the best of friends. I wouldn't have it any other way.
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